So Like Usual I Interpreted the Text Wrong.

As I began reading the book, The Bluest Eye, I thought the book was going to be about slavery, racism, and depression of the African Americans. Simply from the title, I thought, okay maybe it's about the life of a white girl with "blue eyes" and the life of an African American girl during the time of slavery and how their lives were so different, and that in the future they could possibly become friends and cause much turmoil. I was completely off; as in, no where near!

As I began to read, I felt like I was in a maze! I began reading the first page and nope, that wasn't meant to be the first page of the story. Then I flipped to the next part and was so confused as to why in the world we would be reading a book that sounds as if it had been written by a toddler and the last part of that section simply blew my mind away. I thought Mr. Tangen had lost it or something, but then, I flipped to the next page and surely enough there was the extremely dense story awaiting me. In only the first page, I noted so much symbolism I figured I was going to die because if this is how the story is beginning then I could only imagine how it would continue. "Quiet as it's kept, there were no marigolds in the fall of 1941. We thought, at the time, that it was because Pecola was having her father's baby that the marigolds did not grow." (Morrison introduction) Oh my goodness gracious me! What kind of father would do that to her daughter! I understand that it occurred in greek mythology but even then the father was not aware that he was sleeping with his own daughter!

Now back to the intelligent AP analysis of this page. I found four items which related or symbolized each other. I italicized these words in the quote above to illustrate my point. The marigolds symbolize fertility in the time in which this story takes place. Apparently at this time it could have been winter due to the lack of fertile grounds, or it could simply be symbolizing the barren girls of the land. After that, we run into the quote, "It was a long time before my sister and I admitted to ourselves that no green was going to spring from our seeds... We had dropped our seeds in our own little plot of black dirt just as Pecola's father had dropped his seeds in his own plot of black dirt." (Morrison Introduction) This quote conveys that the earth, black dirt, and/or plot is referring to the mother trying to be fertile and that the seeds can only be the children which they are trying to conceive. Saying "black dirt" is a very derrogatory way of describing your own daughter. From this, we can infer that this book will not only be full of symbolism, but also full of racism, which leads to awful situations in which we can only understand a small potion of why or how they happened.

Why Darkness?

Why must we always read depressing books! Why can't there ever be happy endings! I say we should just read Disney stories. I'm sure Victor (mine would be too long and too much of a summary due to the fact that I know all of the stories by heart; therefore, making it a not so good essay) can still write an amazing essay about the millions of disney princesses who go through distress, learn about themselves, and find their true loves while they are at it. Well I guess I will never win this battle with Mr. Tangen because I don't think I will ever be able to convince him to do such a thing.

If there are two things that I value the most, they are honesty and justice, which go hand in hand. If something were to happen, wether it be good or bad, I would want to know exactly what happened, why it happened, and what is being done about it. I don't appreciate people who try to sugarcoat things or who try to "beat around the bush." The truth is black or white; no in between colors. Although this is my opinion, this may not apply to everyone. Some people may have good intentions, but it depends on the person they are talking to wether it is the right thing to do or not. In the end of the novel, Marlow sugarcoats an ending to Kurtz's wife making it sound much more happy and fluffy and romantic. If Mrs. Kurtz wanted this we will never know, but it seems to have been an ok thing to do. It made the ending seem not so harsh to her and maybe to Marlow himself. The problem is that if she finds out the truth later on, Marlow is the one who will look terrible! I noticed this happen in other times throughout the book, where Marlow overexaggerated things or added details which werent likely to have happened, but because we did not go with him on the real journey, we cannot make any statement contradicting what he says.

"It's Not What You Say, It's How You Say It!" -Maria Suarez

As I began The Heart of Darkness I thought, "Oh great, another depressing book about racism and social classes that I can't even understand or enjoy because of the manner in which the speak and just the book in itself." Yes, I was right (but only for the first 16ish pages.) Then things started to change, not much, but slowly.

The book began talking about the setting and how things worked when you lived on a ship and etc. Conrad used much sight imagery to depict the setting; therefore, I as a reader had a clear picture of where the story was taking place (at the time because the setting could change any minute especially due to the fact that they are on a boat.) The narrator made that life seem rather boring and monotonous. Always doing the same things and following the same routines. His descriptions were bland and lifeless making me want to poke my eyes out because I thought the rest of the book would follow in the same way.

But then I started thinking of what it would be like to live on a ship for most of my life. I would find that life as a challenge. I, as a person, constantly need to be moving and doing things or I go insane! Even when I listen to lectures I most of the time am picking at my hair which is not out of disrespect or boredom, it's just because I cannot stay still and concentrated on one thing for more than 5 seconds. Life on a ship would be hard for me, but it would be like a never ending adventure. Trying to find different things to do, finding a million ways to do something or not to do something, making stories and pretending something like the titanic was happening. I would make my life on the ship entertaining.

Although that is what I would do, the book differed completely. The book began with a small description of some of the characters, one of the most important being Marlow, a seaman and a wanderer. On pages 15-17, Marlow started to tell his story of how he became captain of a ship and what his story was of how he got there. The story in itself was so boring but the way Marlow described each feeling made you feel them aswell kind of like 'pena jena' (I think thats how you spell it) in spanish. Marlow used all types of imagery so that we could see what he was seeing, hear what was going on, and feel how nervous he must have been on this knew journey he had embarked on. Although the book is not of the most exciting, Conrad did an excellent job using imagery and feelings to make the reader connect to the characters.

Anya's Light Bulb Finally Came On!

While we read the play I didn't realize any situations in which a character went through anagnorisis (when a character in a book or a play makes a critical discovery.) When I read the description of what the next blog was to be about I HAD NO IDEA WHAT TO DO! I thought I was going to have to reread the whole play again just to find one scene where it occurred! Thank goodness for the presentation we all had to do of the play! It just so happened that in the scene I had to present, Anya realized that she needed to get rid of the Cherry Orchard and all the strings attached to it or she would never come out of the debt or it would be a long time before she did. This happens as the family is out and leaves Anya and Trofimov alone to talk about the fate of the orchard, and she finally tells him that she must get rid of all ties she has with it and why it will cause her much grief if she stays with it. Of course during our presentation, we adapted the scene to a modern day in Plantation, Florida, but the moral and lesson stayed the same.

Talk About Spastic!

In Act 3 (actually throughout the whole play), the characters in "The Cherry Orchard" are extremely spastic. I meant to point this out in earlier blogs, because it happens all of the time in the play, but I would begin discussing a different topic and then completely forget about it. I found the play extremely confusing due to this odd feature Chekov decided to add to his play. As I read, I feel my brain trying to sort out 20 different stories that belong to 20 different characters which somehow need to mesh together and come out to one ending and make sense; therefore, successfully creating and finishing the play.

Thank goodness for youtube!!!!! The videos of the play helped to keep track of the many different paths which each character tended to follow. The video also made the play seem like more of an extremely dramatic movie, which made it easier to follow and remember. Sometimes when you read, you tend to misread words or entire phrases, or you can misinterpret what the author is trying to portray through his characters. The video made sure that through facial expressions and actions the watcher would receive the exact message the author was trying to give in the book (that is if the director received the right message and creates the movie giving the right message.)

The play also helped me understand the characters and what happened in the play (particularly our scene.) Having to act out a character is a hard task, not only do you have to memorize lines and dress as the person, but you also must enter into that characters mind set. You have to understand why he/she did what he/she did and must be able to portray the scene in a way that makes sense and can relate to the persons way of thinking.